I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY!!

a year ago today i was sitting in east hampton wishing waiting and hoping for the next week to go by fast, and slow all at the same time. a year ago next week i was on a plane flying alone next to the window with a dead ipod and a four hour ride of contemplating my next move. a year ago next month i was a confident sassy 19 year old that had just traveled across the country and survived, barely...i got into trouble, was slightly misguided, made new friends, and got in touch with old ones again. but i had discovered a new me.

but today i sit here back to the old me, back to my boring reality. i have been thinking of the first few months i was back from new york, back to what my outlook on life was. i didn't care what anyone thought of me i was certain of who i was... i was going to class, i wanted to work, i actually read and tried to study. but then tragedy struck and i was stuck again....

i thought going blonde again would help me recapture the magic i had once upon a time... but i realize now that i have to start putting back the peices on my own, i have to recapture the lessons that i learned.

i started this blog because i have something to say-- i started it because i love to hash out my thoughts in the written form, but somewhere along the way i started to become insecure about what my blog said about me to the world... to depressing, you are so dramatic. I WRITE TO RELEASE MY INNER DRAMA (her name is chuck,) my idea of this blog a year ago was an outsource to the chaos in my head. and now i have remembered that and here we are. i apologize to those of you who keep tabs on my on goings through this source. i will write about events from time to time but only when it is relevant to my rant.

happy blogging all and be prepared... chuck has a lot to say.